The ‘2000th’(or thereabouts!) Run.
Hares: Short – Ugly Bum & Ad Nauseum.
Medium – Shoe Shopper & Wet Patch.
Long – Big Head & Virginia Slim.
Where: Turf City, Bukit Timah.
On On; The British Club
The 2000th Run
What a great event this was. Great location for the run site, 90 Registrations, 3 fabulous runs and a fantastic On On at The British Club. And the photo slide show that brought back a lot of memories. Well done everyone that was involved in the organizing, setting runs, behind the scenes etc etc. And a special well done to Sneaky Comer who started doing his bit over a year ago. Great effort, a lot of time and effort for great results.
And to everyone who runs, or has run with the Harriets, didn’t it make you reflect on what a great little Club the Harriet’s really is. On On!
The Run(s)
The Long runners bussed out early to the Venus Drive area for a 1 hour 40 minute slog through some great but rather overgrown territory, including the Japanese Temple, the Medium runners bussed out in Shoe Shoppers car (thus saving $70 on a bus!) to Blackmore Drive for a 1hour 15 run over a variety of terrain and the Short runners stood around waiting for 5 o’clock and wondering if they should have a beer or not before they set off.
The Short Run was one of the best runs I have done in ages. (since I last set a Run actually). Great territory and trails, keeping within the confines of the Turf City area, lots of shiggy, and fantastic Checks that kept everyone together for an enjoyable 55 minutes. This was what Hash should all be about. Great stuff Hares. And the Drill Master.
The Medium Run, which was rather short on numbers, took in a bit of the old railway line, the jungle Kampong near Clementi Rd. almost the Ulu Pandan Canal, Old Holland Rd to eventually end up at the Red Lantern for the ‘On Home.’ Twin Towers worked her bum off, and what a lovely bum it is to get worked off. ‘Itchy Bower Son’ (Australian phonetic spelling of his name – with apologies) stopped for a pee at a T Check, lost the pack and the trail and went MIA. Pissed off I guess, or just a little pee-ved! But he made it bac, no worries.
More about the Medium Run below, thanks Wet Patch.
‘The trail was long and crossed an old railway line
That led us to who knows where …. just the Hare
Are we on? She’s gone and lost the trail again
Back on paper, need a woman.
So on we go, we came to an old Kampong
No paper was there, we checked everywhere!
Crossed astream, got wet, and had another fall
Back on paper, need a woman.
If I’m Hashing at all
I’m hashing on Wednesdays
This 2000th Run was way better than Friday’s
We loved the mud and shiggy.
It’s on Old Holland Road
That we made our return
Some started to swear, we thought we’d never get there!
Thought the trail never would be found at all.
Back on paper, need a woman!’ (and a beer – scribe)
More info about the Long run was not forthcoming – at the time of going to print, none of the finishers had recovered their breath or strength to comment. Say no more! But it was a top run, going by comments from all who did it. Venus Drive, Japanese Temple, swim the canal, home via Eng Neo. Top stuff. Thanks Hares.
The Circle: Wet Brazilian was a little over awed by the occasion and kept asking for advice on what she should do next. ‘It’s your Circle, do what you like,’ was the continuous reply from Sneaky Comer. The Circle commenced as soon as the Long runners got back, not even waiting for the one of the Hares, Big Head, who was still missing in action.
Crikey, so what did we think of that for a run? Popeye was still too out of breath to make comment. Big Head then made it back. Short run was deemed a great run, good stuff the shorties. The Medium run was judged just right for medium rare, and the Long run was certainly well done, almost verging towards slightly overdone but certainly not burnt. Three fantastic runs that satisfied everyone, well done to all the Hares.
At this stage, Stiffy arrived from the Long run, coming in the wrong way.
Tell us about your On On: The British Club. Fantastic feast and drinks.
Next week’s run: Two Jugs Farewell Run. Clementi Park.. Check the website as usual.
Visitors / Returnees: There was a tribe of visitors and returnees. A special mention though for the return of Skidmarks and Sherpa.
Virgins: Nil. Well, after 2000 runs, there can’t be many left.
Lipstick: Nope.
Tits: Herr Zipp does not give Delegator the Tits for her pointing out the hazards of pissing standing up. Nor does he give them to Two Jugs or Father Anus for hugging on the run. Herr Zipp tells us that while the other 2 runs had Hares, the Short Run had a drill sergeant armed with a big long white stick. Anyone who stepped one inch out of line was immediately disciplined by Drill Sergeant Ugly Bum.
Dick: Boo reminded us of a certain male who whinges on every run he goes on. And tonight he whinged on his own run, and he was the Hare. Will you stop whinging Ad Nauseum?
Awards – nope
AOB:
· Ex GM’s come in, all 8 of them. ‘Look at all the Grandmothers,’ commented Boo. (collective IQ ?). [Ed welcome back Cookie (1996) and Peckerchecker (2001) both came up from Australia for the run. The others were Ugly Bum (1997), Confucius (2003), Big Head (2005), Mother’s Tongue (2006), Wet ‘n Wild (2008, 2009), and Shoe Shopper (2010)].
· Ratnam, who set the Harriet’s Run number 1, is brought in. He then gave a bit of a history lesson on the Harriets. It started with 8 girls, runs 2&3 did not happen (now I am really confused about what run number we are really up to!) and in those days, Singapore was a bit on the wild side and deemed too dangerous for girls to be out on their own at night, hence the need for male members to protect them.
· Confucius and Kamala started running in 1973 and are given a drink. ‘1973 they started, did they do the long run?’ asks Herr Zipp. They must be tired, no wonder they need a drink.
· Ugly Bum now knows why we have had trouble with determining what run number we are actually up to – it is Ratnam’s fault because Runs 2&3 were not set. Now I am really confused.
· Shoe Shopper asked Wet Patch for some flour to mark a Circle Check when they were setting their run. ‘Sorry, we are out of flour.’ said Wet Patch. However, after persistence from Shoe Shopper, he put his hand inside the bag and proudly announced ‘Hang on, I have a little knob.’ A big knob would have been better thought SS, but she made do with his little knob anyway.
· Cock Radio told how the walkers often don’t need to follow trail, they just stroll along at the back of the pack having a chat and following those in front who do all the hard work in finding trail, breaking checks etc. Tonight, one such person, found herself in an unfamiliar position – as the lead woman. Clearly out of her depth, she turned to me and said ‘What is all that paper and red / white tape in front of us?’ Umm, Deep Throat, that is what the Hares mark the trail with and we follow it. ‘Oh, I see.’ A new learning experience for her after how many years of Hashing?
· Wet Brazilian is then reminded of a certain male who did always follow trail (well, it was such an obvious T Check lah!) and nor did he always have a woman in front of him (doesn’t a female horse count) On in Cock Radio.
· Suck Swallow reminds us that Belcher and Veggie Queen are leaving Singapore on a jet plane and they don’t know when they’ll be back again. ‘F*#k of you c#*%s was then sung with considerable emotion and passion.
· Kan Not Kan told how at the 25 minute mark of the medium run, someone asked ‘Are we nearly there yet?’ The sweeping Hare suggested they were only 1/3 of the way. This then prompted Twin Towers into action, and without her effort in breaking 3 of the 5 Checks, just how long the Medium Run would have been? KNK assured us that the Hares really were the meanest, and sung his appropriate song with gusto.
· Shoe Shopper asked Shoeless where he was going after the run. ‘I didn’t bring any long pants and shoes for the British Club,’ was his reply. And where would such a fashion conscious and trendy dresser like Shoeless go to get clothes? Giant Supermarket over at Turf City of course. Long pants $19.50 and a pair of shoes for $15.99. You will see him in next month’s Vogue magazine.
· Wet Brazilian gets the foreign GM’s in. Kampong, Lion City, Seletar (Popeye was still a bit breathless from the long run) and Brussels were all represented.
· Higgins, the Brussels GM, gives a plug for the big weekend they will be having in Brussels in 3 years time. (They have to wait 3 years to have a big weekend? – must be a dull place)
· Subs are due. Please.
Scribed by Cock Radio. (With special thanks to Wee Willy Winky Herr Zipp for holding the lantern so I could see)
This week’s Chinese Proverb
Confucius say: Wat better than All Blacks beating French by 55 points? All Blacks beating French by 1 point in World Cup
World Cup Rugby.
What do you call a French Rugby supporter in NZ for the World Cup?
Lost.
Did you hear French Post has just recalled their latest batch of stamps?
They had photos of their Rugby team on them & people couldn’t figure out which side to spit on.
And the following rules that have applied for the last month while the World Cup is on;
Dear Women,
1. From 9 Sep to 23 October 2011, you should read the sports section of the newspaper so that you are aware of what is going on regarding the World Cup, and that way you will be able to join in the conversations. If you fail to do this, then you will be looked at in a bad way, or you will be totally ignored. DO NOT complain about not receiving any attention.
2. During the World Cup, the television is mine, the VCR and DVD are all mine, at all times, without any exceptions. If you even take a glimpse of the remote control, you will lose it (your eye).
3. If you have to pass by in front of the TV during a game, I don’t mind, as long as you do it crawling on the floor and without distracting me. If you decide to stand nude in front of the TV, make sure you put clothes on right after because if you catch a cold, I won’t have time to take you to the doctor or look after you during the World Cup month.
4. During the games I will be blind, deaf and mute, unless I require a refill of my drink or something to eat. You are out of your mind if you expect me to listen to you, open the door, answer the telephone, or pick up the baby that just fell from the second floor….it won’t happen.
5. It would be a good idea for you to keep at least 2 six packs in the fridge at all times, as well as plenty of things to nibble on, and please do not make any funny faces to my friends when they come over to watch the games. In return, you will be allowed to use the TV between 12pm and 3pm, unless they replay a good game that I missed during the day.
6. Please, please, please!! If you see me upset because one of my teams is losing, DO NOT say ‘get over it, it’s only a game’, or ‘don’t worry, they’ll win next time’. If you say these things, you will only make me angrier and I will love you less. Remember, you will never ever know more about rugby than me and your so called ‘words of encouragement’ will only lead to a break up or divorce.
7. You are welcome to sit with me to watch one game and you can talk to me during halftime but only when the commercials are on, and only if the halftime score is pleasing me. In addition, please note I am saying ‘one’ game, hence do not use the World Cup as a nice cheesy excuse to ‘spend time together’.
8. The replays of the tries are very important. I don’t care if I have seen them or I haven’t seen them, I want to see them again. Many times, and record them.
9. Tell your friends NOT to have any babies, or any other child related parties or gatherings that requires my attendance because:
a) I will not go,
b) I will not go, and
c) I will not go.
10. But, if a friend of mine invites us to his house on a Sunday to watch a game, we will be there in a flash.
11. The daily World Cup highlights show on TV every night is just as important as the games themselves. Do not even think about saying ‘but you have already seen this…why don’t you change the channel to something we can all watch??’, the reply will be: ‘Refer to Rule #2 and Rule #8 of this list’.
12. Please save your expressions such as ‘Thank goodness the World Cup is only every 4 years’. I am immune to these words, because after this comes the reruns of the Rugby World Cup, etc etc.
13. And finally, if you are female and your “man” likes rugby less than you, he is not a real man and shall be bound by these rules and additionally be referred to as “the bitch” for the duration of the World Cup.
Thank you for your cooperation.
Regards,
Men of the world. Anyone for a frogs leg?