The Run:
According to Cock Radio:
The Car Park was in good condition – firm, no shiggy and well marked. Good run.
According to Sneaky Comer:
Kan Not Kan arrived back at the run site just before 6pm. A somewhat positive sign given that last Friday’s run was apparently 1:40 for the FRB’s. Head out along Jurong Road, he reported, trail starts near the bus stop. Somehow Posh Nash interpreted this as check the bus stop down by the car park, but she was soon put right and off we headed. Into track 10 12 14 16 18 20 22 not sure we headed, all was going well and we were on trail, until (perhaps) the stream crossing. At this point it all went to custard when we picked up trail, although possibly not tonight’s trail. Explaining what had happened later to KNK, we were told no, that’s not where the trail went. Oh well. Anyway, happily following trail we found our way to up near the soldier’s camp and trail disappeared. We spent 10 minutes wandering around aimlessly, at which point the pack broke up into 7 groups. Mr Potato Head checked for 3 miles in every direction and finally declared he was doing his own run. Boo and much of the pack headed over towards Bukit Batok Road. Posh Nash, Stiff, myself, a visitor or two headed back towards Jurong Road and found trail about 500m later. Well marked trail. Using the famous invisible red and white plastic tape favoured by KNK. So off we went. All looked good. We followed and followed little loops, muddy patches under umbrella leaf, through stream, over path. And this lead us nicely back past the original out trail. Which sadly we didn’t notice until we had run well past it. So we retraced our steps, headed in the out trail, and on home just on the hour. Nice run. Even if it was a combination of Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday trail.
The Circle: ‘Hare in the Circle,’ was the request, but it was suggested that the word ‘Hare’ was a misnomer as there was no trail.
Crikey, so what did we think of that for a run? ‘What did we think of the run?’ The reply was ‘What run?’ The Hare was told he could set that run again and no one would know. I think it was decided that it could have been a good run.
Tell us about your On On: Paradise Seafood Restaurant aka The Greasy Spoon. $12.
Next week’s run: Blackmore Drive, Shaggy Dick Too.
Visitors / Returnees: Totally Unacceptable, Vibrator, Stiff, Two Arse, WTF is Christine, Burning Sensation from New Jersey, Fawlty Towers, Last Minute Dot Com. Welcome all.
Virgins: Nope
Tits: Cock Radio has lost misplaced them. Not often I can’t get my hands on a pair of tits.
Dick: The Asia Blonde, Tiger Lily, still has it.
Lippy: No lippy, so a spanking is called for instead. Vibrator, who complains how can he get caught in front if there was no trail? A good point, but he gets a spanking anyway. Shaggy Dick Too tries to sneak in for a spanking too.
Awards – Open To The Floor – 50 runs. Now F#*k off.
AOB:
· Stiffy reminds us that the European Common Market is in trouble, but is the Spanish Government going too far in budget cuts. Schools will only be given 25 metres of toilet paper per student for the year. They have also taken curry off their canteen menu. Will the Spanish Hash follow suit? Open To The Floor takes the charge in place of the absent Spanish GM.
· Shaggy Dick Too, in breaking news, tells us that an Australian has been sentenced to a whipping in Saudi Arabia for blasphemy. And how many lashes of the cane would be appropriate? 10? No. 20? No. 50? No. Surely not 100? No. 500 lashes will do the job. Cock Radio is charged as the Aussie blasphemer. But all I said was ‘this meal is fit for Jehovah.’ See, he said it again says SD2! Jehovah, Jehovah!
· Cock Radio then informs us that the above mentioned person destined for 500 lashes was not your usual everyday Aussie yobo, but was actually a shite sh’ite Muslim on a pilgrimage to Mecca. So Kan The Kobra was charged for being a dumb Muslim blonde for not knowing better.
· Wet N Wild reaffirms that there is a major world crisis taking place right now – The Hash has no wine tonight. And the biggest whiner of all, Stiffy, is charged for forgetting to bring the wine.
· Seletar Hash are holding a New Year D&D. They certainly won’t be without beer or wine. See Virginia Slim for details.
· Wet N Wild calls in the Marathon Runners. Shaggy Dick Too, Maggot (look alike Stiffy) Tiger Lily (look alike visitor, despite Not Tonight insisting she would be Tiger) Comes Quietly (look alike Mr. Potato Head) and Wet Brazilian (look alike Not Tonight). Well done all.
· At this stage, with such a small Circle, the charges dried up and Wet N Wild was about to bring it to a close. But it was way too early, and the emergency fund of charges was brought out to the rescue.
· Cock Radio was sound asleep on Monday night, only to be woken by a missed call on my phone at 12.45am. Looking at the display, I saw it was from Shaggy Dick Too. Fearing that he had fallen out of bed and dislocated his shoulder, or stumbled into a drain on the way home from the Sunset Way Coffee Shop, again, I immediately rang him back to check on his safety.
When he answered, he replied that he had received a missed call from me, and had rung me to check on my health and safety! It did not matter to him that the missed call from me was actually made at noon on Sunday. Here’s to the caring friends!
· Not Tonight gave Open To The Floor a farewell charge. A half –hearted attempt at ‘She’s Leaving on a Jet Plane,’ disintegrated, and was quickly transformed into an enthusiastic version of ‘F#*k off you C@#t.’
· Sneaky Comer remembers one night when he was flying out of Singapore, Open To The Floor made him drink. As Open To The Floor is flying out later tonight, he gets revenge and brings her in for another drink.
· Kan Not Kan reckons it is a pretty stupid thing to do – coming to one of his runs when you are flying out later on. Open To The Floor back in for another drink.
· And why didn’t Vibrator help KNK set the run as he had promised? He was too bust helping Open To The Floor pack her knickers. Word is he even tried to pack the pair she was wearing.
· Of course, former committee members need to be recognized when they leave Singapore. Back in Open To The Floor, ex committee member. Thank you.
· Sneaky Comer is sick of his computer showing up a squiggly line under a certain Hasher’s name every time he receives the run report from the scribe for mailing out. Ok, I get confused. Is it Kan Not Can, Can Not Kan, Can Not Can, Kan Not Kan, Kan Kan, Cannot Kan??? How about if I just call him ‘The tall Scottish git,’ to make it easier.
· Stiffy says there has been a mistake – we were trying to get rid of Vibrator, not Open To The Floor. Open To The Floor gets another drink as an apology!
· Cock Radio and others enjoyed a belated surprise 50th Birthday for Sneaky Comer last Sunday. But Sneaky did not look to surprised when the guests turned up – did he know we were coming to his surprise party?? Seems that several weeks ago he heard his wife on the computer in the next room yelling out ‘F#*k,’ ‘F#*k,’ ‘F#*k,’ ‘F#*k,’ ‘F#*k,’ before calling him for assistance. She had been trying to mail out invitations to the party, but had trouble copying addresses from the Harriet’s mailing list. Before she called in her IT expert husband, she thoughtfully minimized the invitation so as he would not know what she was up to. However, the minimized document at the bottom of the screen was titled ‘Tony’s surprise birthday.’ If that was not enough of a clue, she also sent the invitations on the Harriet’s On Sec address, which Sneaky also accesses and to which we all replied we would be coming. So not only did Sneaky Comer set up the mail out for his own surprise party, but he received the replies as well. ‘SURPRISE!’ Don’t worry Wet N Wild, it’s the thought that counts!
· Wet N Wild surprised her work colleagues by holding the ‘Surprise’ Party at the same restaurant that her work were having their end of year bash. Selected colleagues were allowed into our private room, while the majority were told to f#*k off out the back with the riff raff.
· Shaggy Dick Too tries to get Stiffener on a ‘no hash gear’ charge, but fails. However, he has more success with a female visitor, Burning Sensation, and Open To The Floor, who is in her ‘Flying out’ clothes and cops another drink.
· Cock Radio has Open To The Floor back in. After losing her way in the car park at last week’s run, how was she going to cope with such a large country as Ghana? Will she get out of the airport? At this rate, will she make it to the airport?
· Shaggy Dick Too has just had a breaking news newsflash 12 hours from now – ‘lady thrown off plane drunk.’ Open To The Floor back in for another drink. Cock Radio offers her a seat.
· Kan Not Kan then asks Open to The Floor why she is going to Ghana – who gambles there? At this stage, a taxi pulls up – is it Open to The Floor’s? No, it was a big truck with green lights over cabin looking for a park.
· The big truck was closely followed by Boxer, turning up with a farewell cake for Open To The Floor. While the cake was cut, the charges continued fast and furious, I could not keep up with scribing as I think I was involved in a few of them.
Anyway, things all got a bit emotional for Open To The Floor and we finally adjourned to the Greasy Spoon.
And on that note, it’s on on on. See you mid January, off to OZ for 3 weeks. Merry Christmas everyone and safe running.
Scribed by Cock Radio, with additional run report by Sneaky Comer.
An elderly couple had dinner at another couple’s house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen.
The two gentlemen were talking, and one said, ‘Last night we went out to a new restaurant and it was really great… I would recommend it very highly.’
The other man said, ‘What is the name of the restaurant?’
The first man thought and thought and finally said, ‘What is the name of that flower you give to someone you love?
You know… The one that’s red and has thorns.’
‘Do you mean a rose?’
‘Yes, that’s the one,’ replied the man.
He then turned towards the kitchen and yelled, ‘Rose, what’s the name of that restaurant we went to last night?’