The Run: ‘Teams’ were allocated and given a waterproof pack of clues, answer sheet and pencil, although we were uncertain how much lead Stiffy had in his pencil. This was to be a team effort run. However, King Leer, in Tiger Lily’s team, commented that group consensus was non existent. In fact, Tiger applied the theory of ‘Unnatural Selection,’ which meant she failed to listen to any team member’s opinion and eliminated them one by one by sprinting off into the distance. Team members who could not keep up with her were eliminated. Darwin’s theory of the survival of the fittest is proven.
Virginia Slim wanted to get some team bonding going by holding everyone’s hands. However, it was not only the men’s hands he wanted to hold. This team proceeded cautiously with male teamwork.
Many Singaporean monuments were visited on this cultural run, including:
National History Museum
St Andrews Cathedral
The Padang
The Esplanade
The Merlion
Boat Quay etc etc
Along with some obscure places:
Hello Dolly
Big Bird
Brass Monkeys
Molly Malone’s
Eat, Drink Party
A notable place that was not included was Pagoda St Chinatown. This did not prevent Hooray waiting there on his own for 15 minutes.
Maggot and CR did their own high altitude training by running around Fort Canning 5 times 15 times.
Maggot’s highlight was a young girl in a short black dress.
Mine was a young girl in a skimpy black bikini, pool side at Hotel Fort Canning.
Maggot was first to the drink stop on River Valley Rd, but he was not in a team.
Fat Crashing Bastard was technically the first there, but he was alone without his team.
King Leer was first back home – but he was on his own, a victim of the ‘Unnatural Selection of the Survival of the Fittest,’ a process implemented by Dictator T. Lily.
The first intact team (physically, but maybe not mentally) to arrive home was the Stiffy Team – Wet Pet, Posh Nash, Two Jugs, Mother’s Tongue and an adopted son, Boo (he commenced the run late at 5.25 as an orphan).
First genuine (if there is such a thing) runners were back at 7.17, piss heads at 7.45.
The Circle: Wet & Wild got us going under a lovely Fort Canning Sky. She also started the Circle.
Crikey, so what did we think of that for a run?
Too much shiggy, not enough of Pagoda St. Sprite at a drink stop? A thoughtful run, thanks gals.
Tell us about your On On:
Timbre, formerly the Fat Frog, far end of the Park, go straight, drive that way then that way, left, bit further then right, keep your passenger on your left, watch out for speeding Ferraris, make sure back seat passengers are still in the back and if you go over what you think is a speed hump but end up being hurled 80 metres into the air, then you have reached the Bungee Bar at the River and you’ve gone too far.
Oh, by the way, not much parking there, better to leave the car where it is and walk. It’s only 2 minutes.
Next week’s run: The Aussies, Australia Day, Blackmore Drive.
Visitors / Returnees:
Tits, Semen, King Leer, Totally Unacceptable, Simon, Bagless 2, Sticky Ring, Boxer.
Virgins:
nope.
New Member: nope.
Lipstick: Boo, Bagless 2 and Fat Crashing Bastard.
Tits: Kannot Kan forget he had Tits.
Dick:
The GM has it in her hands.
Awards –
nope
AOB:
- Wet Pet found a pair of visitors who were keen on a pearl necklace. In comes Tits and Semen.
- Kannot Kan asks the pearl necklace lady who she would like to nominate for the Tits. Stiffy is the chosen one. Too bad KK, you need the Tits here to hand over. Keep the Tits.
- Cock Radio to Hooray for waiting on his own at the wrong temple in Chinatown.
- Not Tonight, as one of two pretty gals, tried to give Hooray clues as to which was the correct temple. However the clueless one ignored them.
- Fat Crashing Bastard called in our resident Shell Chemical On Her Ear Engineer, Red Snapper. A Shandy is a mix of beer and lemonade. Mixed by an expert in a proportional way. But this shandy was distinctly weak. Why? The Chemical Engineer is quizzed. The response- they had to carry the drinks all the way from Shell House to the drink stop on River Valley Rd (100 metres) and the sprite was lighter to carry than the beer. Hence the diluted shandy.
- Cock Radio has seen men lure women by offers of chocolates, flowers, wine, etc, but Hooray entices women by offering them containers of warm water to shower with after the run. (How does he warm the water?)
- Wet Pet is disappointed that with all the effort to take runners to notable landmarks, the biggest highlight that Maggot and Stiffy could recall was the pretty gal in the short black skirt.
- Maggot clarifies the Hares alleged calling Hooray to the drink stop. Apparently they hid behind a bush when they saw him approaching –after he had passed on his way to Pagoda St. they stood up and shouted ‘Hooray, he didn’t see us.’
- Pubic Zipp has great news for those that want to wear their favourite clothes but not get charged for non Hash gear. A Harriet’s logo patch for $5. Put it on your G string and feel comfortable.
- Wet N Wild calls in all the over 60 members. It was a squeeze to fit them all in. They all look a healthy bunch though, with lots of stamina and they could just keep on going on. Exposed are Auntie Kamala and Auntie Mother’s Tongue, sitting on chairs at the rear of the Circle.
- Maggot observed Fat Crashing Bastard who is under 60 but proceeded to walk into the Circle for the last charge. Why? He thought it was for people with an IQ of less than 60. Duhh.
- Kannot Kan puts your humble scribe to the test – how do you spell Red Snapper’s job description? Easy – kem i kell n gin ear.
- Wet N Wild charges the Hares – a 2 hour setting of a run on scooters does not equate to a 1 hour run. On yer bikes gals.
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Finally, the run quiz result.
Sybil’s team in 5th
Tiger Lily and Wet Pets teams tied for 3rd
Forced Entry and Wet n Wild’s teams tied for 1st
The 1st team back was Stiffy’s. Plenty of lead in his pencil after all.
On on to the on on.
Scribed by Cock Radio.