The ‘Aussie Day’ Run
Hares: Cock Radio, Maggot and Comes Quietly
Where: Blackmore Drive
On On: Red Lantern
The Run: An out of breath Maggot makes it back just on 6 o’clock to explain the run, and states CR is lost out on trail somewhere. Out into the middle of the field for a Circle Check. I wonder how many people knew they were searching over an old Chinese Cemetery?? Along the far side of the canal, with some nice little shiggy patches just before getting up onto the former railway line.
Unfortunately Tiger Lily was near the front at this stage, and the long fast stretch saw her 400 meters ahead of everyone at the bridge on Old Holland Rd. This meant she had found the T Check on the other side and had come back before everyone else got to the bridge.
CR was discovered directing runners into a track of Old Holland Rd. and warning walkers to go the other direction. Some serious bush bashing with a mongrel steep and muddy descent saw runners slide, free fall, drop, plunge and somersault into the big canal.
Wading and trudging through the double tunnel, runners were confronted with a construction site at the usual exit to Ulu Pandan Rd. How were they to get out, they wondered. Exactly the same thoughts the Hares had when they were setting the run.
A new way through the jungle and up the embankment to Ulu Pandan was forged by the innovative Hares. However, they had the trail heading back to Old Holland Rd instead of Clementi Rd.
Clever cross trail setting by the Hares saw the pack head back to home along Old Holland Rd. Tiger Lily missed the turn off up the new unopened road and continued all the way back along Blackmore Rd. Say no more.
Everyone back in one piece, more or less, in 1 hour after a 6.5km workout.
The Circle: Wet Brazilian commenced proceedings under a lovely sky, with nearly 50 in attendance.
Crikey, so what did we think of that for a run?
Too many Aussies, danger level not high enough. Good run.
Tell us about your On On:
Red Lantern, $10.
Next week’s run: Forced Entry’s Birthday Run, Springleaf Rd (dead end part, not the park). Famous Kitchen for On On.
Visitors / Returnees:
There were heaps, forget to get the list.
Virgins:
nope.
New Member: Nope.
Lipstick: Cock Radio and Impossible
Tits: Zipp was told before the run by a young handsome man where the short cut was for walkers. She then retracts on the young handsome statement and calls in Maggot. He told her to go left for the short cut but when she was out on trail, Cock Radio told walkers to go right. Get it correct guys. Maggot takes the Tits.
Dick:
Boo has enough trouble understanding English but was totally stumped when having a conversation with a French visitor. Trying to explain the Dick to the Frenchie would be impossible, so Stiff gets the Dick for bringing him. An appropriate French song was then sung.
Awards –
nope
AOB:
- The GM is having a good laugh. ‘We can’t do AOB yet, you haven’t done the Dick yet,’ said a concerned Committee Member. On in Wet N Wild, and pay attention.
- Maggot gets his co hare in. At the Old Holland Rd bridge while setting the run, it was decided that one of us should run back to the start to give the runners their instructions, while the other Hare should stay at the Bridge to relay the home trail after the Pack go through. Cock Radio was already sitting down on the Bridge before Maggot could ask who wants to do what. Off you go Maggot.
- Tiger Lily went to the Sunday Oz Day Run, which ended with a BBQ at Maggot’s. On deciding it was time to go home, she said see you later to Maggot. 20 minutes later, Maggot found her wondering around the Condo grounds, lost! Just confirms what we already knew.
- Wet Pet discovered a Harriet after a bit of hanky panky while her husband is away. Ugly Bum is in, and immediately a line of males queue up, with Virginia Slim at the front.
- Not Tonight recalls how Maggot pre run instructions included ‘It is a challenging run, but ‘older’ members can stay on the flat. Fat Crashing Bastard took the challenge and took a fall, injuring his suspect shoulder. As he crawled his way back to home, Nurse Pubic Zipp raced to him with First Aid. FCB must have health insurance with extras, as the nurse even held something for him.
- The GM tells of a Harriet who was bleeding profusely from a wound sustained on the run, but shrugged it off as just a flash wound. Cock Radio tests her bravery by making her eat a Vegemite sandwich (unfortunately I can’t remember who the brave one was).
- Tiger Lily was in Tanglin Mall, when she saw a Harriet waiting outside a clinic. Tiger, doing a bit of prying, asked her what she was doing. ‘Having a Brazilian Wax,’ was the reply. Lost Marbles is brought in to the calls of ‘Prove it.’
- Big Head acts out a little play. Using the kerbing as a prop for the substantial wall that runners had to negotiate, she has Goes Down Easy stand on top and she is kindly helped down by Stiff and Comes Quietly. They then run off into the distance, leaving Big Head stranded alone on top of the wall.
- Fat Crashing Bastard watched Ugly Bum open the boot of her car, which contained 50 Australia Day balloons. However, as she opened the boot, 57 of them burst.
- Sneaky Comer is proud that an OZ Day tradition continues. Once again, no Aussie shirt. This continues the pattern that he so strongly adhered to when he was in charge, and is glad nothing has changed this year, despite CR’s boasting about being able to get the job done.
- Cock Radio, sick of being told to ‘Speak English,’ by Boo, decides to educate him by teaching him to speak ‘Orstralian.’ The lesson ends with Boo having a vegemite sandwich.
- Stiffy went around to the GM’s house one night during the week (what for?), only to find it in total darkness. What sort of job does she have that allows her to go to Bali during a working week?
- Slocum calls in Gypsy for soliciting on the Geylang Run. Hang on, that was 3 months ago. Slowcum has Alzheimer’s? Boo is brought in also as a hooker – in High School Rugby. All 3 are given a vegemite, but Gypsy tries to do a runner.
- Stiff heard a strange call on the run. ‘Ohh, ahhhhh!’ Tiger Lily gets a vegemite sanga to see if she can repeat the call.
- The GM was impressed by Comes Quietly’s commando roll during a fall.
- Virginia Slim was kidnapped on Thursday, taken to a house guarded by a vicious dog. He was hoping for a quick rape and release as no one would pay the ransom. Instead he was held captive for hours and made to drink alcohol until he was finally rescued by Dances With Kerbs. Beware of her hospitable husband!
On on to the on on.
Scribed by Cock Radio.