The ‘Chinese Valentines New Year’ Run
Hares: Cock Radio.
Where: Sembawang Park, car park B.
On On: 1036 Coffee Shop
The Run: ‘Oh we do like to be beside the seaside, oh we do like to be beside the sea.’ Ah, smell the salt in the air. And that deep blue ocean, the white sand beach and the gentle surf rolling in with children frolicking in the shallows. Well, that’s how it was pictured on the advertising billboard for new beachside units there.
So along the oil stained brown beach the pack ran, leaping over the piles of rubbish washed up from the murky waters of the Straits. At least the sun was out. Gypsy kept the Pack going with enthusiastic calling (the way it is meant to be – take note front runners!). At one stage he sounded like a ships fog horn.
Leaving the beach, runners made their way around the black and white house areas of Sembawang, determinedly solving the numerous challenging Checks. Their task was not made easier by the 3 blind mice, Tiger Lily, Shaggy Dick and a visitor who insisted on running through T Checks.
Big Head was told by an elderly local out on a walk, ‘You run so slow lah.’ Cheeky bugger. Wonder if he has extracted himself from the hedge that Big Head pushed him into.
The main Pack was back in 1hour 14 minutes after a 9.5km workout, although Comes Quietly managed to do 12.6km. Something to do with him deviating a long wrong way at a Check near the canal. ‘Far canal,’ was his comment.
The Circle: The Proxy GM, Wet ‘n Wild, gets things underway under a beautiful sky, palm trees swaying in the tropical breeze..
Crikey, so what did we think of that for a run?
Not enough checks, far canal. A Very Good run. Well done Cock.
Tell us about your On On:
1036 Coffee Shop, the usual great food for $10.
Next week’s run: Tiger Lily, Bukit Gombak.
Visitors / Returnees: Shaggy Dick Too, Wee Willy, Impossible, Right Royal Tit, Big Beer Tits, Trash
Virgins:
Too wet.
New Member: Nope.
Lipstick: Shaggy Dick Too, receives a kiss from Twin Towers and Kamala.
Tits: Back from Penang, Maggot’s fondest early memories of the Harriet’s was Shaggy Dick Too with the Tits. And for no other reason than for old time’s sakes, Shaggy gets the Tits. Thanks for the mammaries.
Dick:
Stiffy has the Dick in Myanmar Burma, sorry stuff that corrupt army dictatorship that changed the name.
Awards – nope
AOB:
- Tiger Lily reckons Twin Towers can show enough cleavage without wearing a top that is torn at the V line. Eye popping stuff. Tiger then tells us to give her an ‘On On.’ Tiger Lily for GM!!
- Hooray gets the Aussies in and display their rippling muscles, 6 packs, abs and athletic prowess. And just like that, the report claiming all Australian sportsmen are on steroids is proven to be a load of crap.
- Maggot however has proof of 3 runners that are steroids. A side effect of steroids is blindness, so in come the 3 Blind Mice. Tiger Lily and Shaggy confess by coming in. However, the 3rd member is suffering more serious side effects, as well as blindness he has deafness and loss of identity. The visitor is physically led into the Circle.
- Hoo Ray was in front, he claims,- ‘Bullshit, bullshit…’ Anyway, he charges Wet ‘n Wild and Stiffener for not only listening to his directions on how to get back, but actually trying to follow them. Blind leading the blind.
- Herr Zipp tells us how a Kiwi died from an overdose of Coke. No, not the heroin coke but the good old Coke a Cola. 10 litres of straight Coke a day is a health hazard – dilute it with Bourbon and look after your health. Wet ‘n Wild is in for a drink – make it beer, not Coke please.
- Twin Towers tells us that today is Esh Wednesday. It was almost the end of Esh Wednesday too, as Gypsy told her to stop at the crossing because the man was green, and when it turned to red he said ‘run.’ Funny thing is Twin Towers did exactly that.
- Being Chinese New Year, Croc Hunter is bought in for the traditional giving of the Red Packet and a thank you for all his hard work. Wet ‘n Wild gives a less than traditional greeting that went something like ‘Gong Xi Fat Boy.’ Must have been the Kiwi accent.
- Shaggy Dick was in Hanoi watching Aussie Network on TV. A news report described a drive by shooting in Adelaide. A witness, in stubby shorts, blue truckies singlet and a tattoo saying ‘Mum’ on his left bicep stated that he clearly heard 2 shots, ‘Bang bang bang.’ The Adelaide Education system is due for an overhaul.
- Sneaky Comer calls in a local, Zipp, to act as a translator and give Wet ‘n Wild some basic Chinese language. Maggot then gives her an appropriate local dumb ass song.
- Kamala. Hash hush, living in a country with freedom, you can show your bum and tits to everyone. (think she was referring to Singapore,) Shiggy Piggy is back, (think she was referring to Shaggy) Dances With Kerbs, Zipp. No hugging for 1 year. The charge was all too exiting for Kamala and she lost her drink.
- Sneaker Comer assures us it was a long run, with various devices recording 9.3, 9.6, 9.9kms. But one recorded 12.6km! On in Comes Quietly for using Apple technology.
- Twin Towers charges Trash for taking too much interest in what was under cock radio’s shorts.
- Gypsy’s robust calling while on trail was given recognition by CR.
- Kamala asked if there would be free flow of men at the Valentines Party??
On on to the on on.
Scribed by Cock Radio.
After having dug to a depth of 10 feet last year, British scientists
found traces of copper wire dating back 200 years and came to the
conclusion that their ancestors already had a telephone network more
than 150 years ago.
Not to be outdone by the British, in the weeks that followed, an
American archaeologist dug to a depth of 20 feet, and shortly after, a
story published in the New York Times: “American archaeologists,
finding traces of 250-year-old copper wire, have concluded that their
ancestors already had an advanced high-tech communications network 50
years earlier than the British”.
One week later, Australia’s Northern Territory Times reported the
following: “After digging as deep as 30 feet in his backyard in
Tennant Creek, Northern Territory, Knackers Johnson, a self-taught
archaeologist, reported that he found absolutely bugger-all. Knackers
has therefore concluded that 250 years ago, Australia had already gone
wireless.”
…Makes ya feel bloody proud to be Australian