The Kiwi Invasion Run.
Bukit Brown Chinese Cemetery.
Hares: Thighs the Limits, Sneaky Comer
On On: Red Lantern
The Run:
The Return of Thighs the Limit after 6 years had everyone excited and jumping out of their graves. The only instruction I remember was that there would be a drink stop.
Up Hobbit Hill we went before veering off through the graves. Oh yeah, Sneaky told us not to run on the graves and have respect. I told Posh Nash to be careful as it was very slippery. She told me she was having thoughts of shagging a dick. Sorry, I misheard her. She was thinking of Shaggy Dick, who dislocated his shoulder here last year.
Down to the little stream where the market garden hut is, followed by a T Check.
Unfortunately, this is where things became a little messy for me, as I tripped on a tree root and fell flat on my face, no hands involved. Ouch. Eventually I managed to mumble to F#*king Easy that I was sort of ok, so he kept going and I walked back to the beer wagon in a daze. Luckily I came across Dr Kannot Kan who administered some of his special snake oil onto what was left of my nose. He then prescribed G&T medicine, so off we went in search of the drink stop.
While this was going on, the Pack frolicked around the Mt Pleasant Rd area [ed: over the road to the second part of the cemetery, down to PIE, than back up a discrete distance from the ISD camp] heading to where Sneaky Comer assured them the drink stop would be. But no drink stop. Maybe we ran too fast and they have not set up yet?
No, Wet ‘n Wild and Lost Marbles had set up in the wrong place!
Anyway, the pack finally made it, but not before Dr Kan and I had sampled several G&T’s.
Bloody good run. Unfortunately.
The Circle: Thanks Posh Duck for the torch light.
Crikey, so what did we think of that for a run? Bloody good, a bit on the nose though I thought.
Tell us about your On On: Red Lantern, char siew lamb and kiwi fruit.
Next week’s run: Father Anus and Two Jugs. Yishun Ave 1
Lipstick: Stiffy, Posh Duck, In and Out. I was spared because I never got my nose in front.
Visitors / Returnees: Wee Willy, Fore play, In and Out, Kirsten, Lynda, Sticky Ring, King Leer, Bagless 2, Stiff, Wet ‘n Ready.
Virgins: nope.
New Member: nope.
Tits: Stiffy has them on behalf of Slocum. On arriving at the run tonight, Stiffy was asked by Posh Nash if he would set next week’s run. Hang on a bloody minute, he was a Hare last week. The GM takes the Tits for Posh Nash.
Dick: The GM awards the Dick to Kannot Kan for applying his snake oil lotion to CR’s nose.
Awards –nope
AOB:
- Herr Zipp poses a question at Cock Radio – what plant has no roots? A face plant. Ha ha, so funny lah!
- The Hares were rightly charged for leaving the Pack high and dry. Very dry in fact. Drink stop placed in wrong location was a grave mistake.
- Slocum also charges the Hares for the drink stop stuff up. Then when he got a ride back from the drink stop, he noticed that Lost Marbles, who was driving, had rather glazed eyes. Possibly from sampling more G&T than she served out? And then she got lost.
- In and Out came in. He noticed the spruced up graves, particularly one that looked like a ‘cross between Twin Jugs and Two Towers.’ In and Out gets a charge for getting his jugs mixed up. He also copped a clip over the ear.
- Mother’s Tongue has good words for the recently departed Margaret Thatcher. The Brits are called in, some are not too happy about it and this turned out to be a very divisive charge.
- Not Tonight wonders why only 5 people are wearing ‘Thighs The Limit’ shirts. Not even Thighs the Limit is wearing her own shirt. Shame. But Wet ‘n Ready has an excuse – she said she is too hot to wear it.
- Herr Zipp has a Mickey Mouse charge. A Mouseketeer passed away. Stiff cheese.
- Slocum asks Stiffy what his wife’s last charge was all about. No idea was Stiffy’s reply. Well stop bloody talking and listen son.
- Sneaky Comer has concerns about the limited number of Harriets to fill the upcoming committee positions. But Friday has 20 nominations. Solution: Those not elected for the Friday Committee fill the Harriets. Everyone’s a winner.
- Wee Willy proudly declares he is a Monday Hasher and noticed Stiffy wearing a Monday shirt. But Stiffy has never been to Monday Hash. And then it started. ‘Oh yes I have.’ ‘Oh no you haven’t.’ ‘Oh yes I have.’ ‘Oh no you have.’ ‘Oh yes I haven’t.’ and so on
- Stiffy then claims that Wee Willy is not old enough to remember when Stiffy ran Monday. Last century, if not the one before. Stiffy claims he was given a Hash name at a Monday run held at the Australian High Commission. Wee Willy counteracts by saying Monday does not have Hash names. Stiffy goes on about climbing a fence with a kangaroo tail made with a coat hanger. The 2 of them then went out the back and had a punch up.
- Herr Zip calls Stiffy and Wee Willy back in for talking Hash politics and says something about slipping the adjudicator a big one.
- Zipp then told a politically incorrect joke about dogs swimming to and from Malaysia. Censored.
On that note, On On to the On On.
Scribed by Cock Radio.
Grandma and Grandpa were watching a healing service on TV.
The Evangelist called to all who wanted to be healed to go to their TV
set, place one hand on the TV and the other hand on the body part where they wanted to be healed.
Grandma got up and slowly hobbled to the TV, placed her right hand on the set and her left hand on her arthritic shoulder that was causing her great pain.
Then Grandpa got up, went to the TV and placed his right hand on the set and his left hand on his private parts.
Grandma scowled at him and said, “I guess you just don’t get it, do you?
The purpose of doing this is to heal the sick, NOT to raise the DEAD!!!”