The Anzac Run
Vigilante Drive, Kent Ridge Park
Hares: Sneaky Comer & Cock Radio
On On: 99 South Buona Vista Kitchen (no Anzac biscuits)
Front Runners: It is your
responsibility to call loudly. Runners behind you depend on it.
Shout ‘On On’ loudly and regularly when on trail.
Shout ‘Circle Check’ at a Circle.
Shout ‘T Check’ at a T.
Shout ‘Checking’ if searching at a Circle or T.
Shout ‘Looking’ if trail is lost.
Note ‘Looking’ is different to ‘Checking.’
Also note that males cannot be given lipstick when ‘Checking’ or ‘Looking’ until ‘On On’ is called.
Let’s hear louder calling. See Gypsy for lessons.
The Run:
Kent Ridge, where the Malay Battalion gallantly made one of the last stands against the advancing Japanese in World War 2. Gun and cannon fire sounded out from the hill. In 2013, the only banging up there involves young couples having a bit of nocturnal fun in the back seat of their cars at night time.
Down the steps all the way to the bottom and back up again 50 metres from where we started. Nice one. Then down the S bends and into Hort Park. And straight out again.
Thankfully the couple having wedding photos taken had moved on. Imagine having 30 sweaty Hashers in the background of your photos.
Sneaky led the Pack down a very sneaky way onto Alexandra Road. It was here that the Pack split into 2. Walkers headed back the scenic way through Hort Park. Runners went up onto the board walk towards ISS at the top of the Hill.
Eventually along the old railway line, around the back of Normanton Park for a final stair climb up Kent Ridge to home.
8 kms in an hour. Everyone’s a grinner.
Crikey, so what did we think of that for a run? Late entry for run of the year.
Tell us about your On On: 99 South Buona Vista Kitchen, $10.
Next week’s run: AGM Run, 24-26 Lorong Sesuai.
Lipstick: Hooray, Penile Extension, Butt Wiper, Gypsy
Visitors / Returnees: Penile Extension, The Boxer, Bagless 2, Butt Wiper, Dragon Breath.
Virgins: nope.
New Member: nope.
Tits: The GM was reminded of her youth and the Duracell battery ad with the toy rabbit playing the drum. While the no name brand battery commenced at rapid speed, it soon died out while the Duracell rabbit just kept on and on beating his drum. And so it was with Butt Wiper, and his no name brand battery which allowed him to sprint past the GM several times only to die out, while our Duracell Wet Brazilian just kept on and on running.
Dick: Held by Kannot Kan. 3 candidates.
- Dragon Breath who has taken over from him as Sunday GM
- Zipp – because. Just because.
- Sticky Ring, Big Head, Mother Tongue and Wet ‘n Wild then are brought in, which probably means 3, 4, 5 and number 6 candidates, but KNK can’t count past three. There was mention of Mother Tongue asking why KNK was wearing a shower cap? It was actually his hair. Anyway, Wet ‘n Wild won the Dick.
Awards –nope
AOB:
- Due to Butt Wiper wearing his cap backwards, Gypsy was confused as to which way he was going. One look at Butt Wipers pink socks confirmed that he goes both ways.
- Sneaky Comer observed runners taking the grass shortcuts on the S bends going down the hill, despite the arrows marked on the pathway. But one runner stuck to the path all the way. Well done The Boxer for law abiding, National Parks will send you a Certificate of appreciation.
- Butt Wiper did not run in fast (might have if he used Duracell batteries); it was new member Jackie that led the way. Hash name possibilities:
- Comes First
- Bit Between the Teeth (she works with horses at Kranji)
- Premature Filly
Jackie will now be known forever more as Comes First.
- Hooray charges the Brits for lack of St. George’s Day Run.
- Kannot Kan calls in the Hares. Anzac Day is a somber day but everyone is happy. Rename it Prozac Day?
- Wet Pet charges the Hares for lack of Anzac biscuits. (Sneaky Comer left them at home).
- Cock Radio charged Stiffy for trying to explain from a British perspective the meaning of Anzac Day to F#*king Easy.
- Stiffy then charged F*#king Easy for calling the Aussies stupid for trying to fight the Turks at Gallipoli.
- Dragon’s Breath charged Cock Radio for not wearing a shirt after the run and gives him $5 to buy one at the Sunday Hash.
- Penile Extension was confused with 2 Mrs. Coates at the run – Wet Pet and the Boxer. Which one is his wife?
On that note, On On to the On on.
Scribed by Cock Radio.
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as “Euro-English”.
In the first year, “s” will replace the soft “c”… Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard “c” will be dropped in favour of “k”. This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome “ph” will be replaced with “f”.. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent “e” in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing “th” with “z” and “w” with “v”.
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary “o” kan be dropd from vords kontaining “ou” and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensi bl riten styl.
Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi TU understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.