The ‘Sneak Out the Back Gate While the New Boss is not Looking’ Run
Cock Radio
Sembawang Park
Yes, I’m back! After 8 weeks holiday, you now have the privilege of my company again. And what better way of starting things off by having to try and sneak off early to set a run on the 2nd day of work with a new boss! Posh Nash, are you really certain I volunteered to set this run???? [Ed: we thought it was a funny joke at the time J]
The Run – of the year – the month – the week – this Wednesday
An afternoon tropical deluge ceased in time for a hardy band of Hashers that ventured into the northern reaches of Singapore. A winding amble through the Park brought the Pack to a Circle check down by the water overlooking Johor. Do we need our passports? Many runners believed it would head along the water towards the Canal, including Boo, who headed off to the Mosque and was not seen again. Cock Radio is Great!!
The trail actually came back through the Park and into streets bearing names from the formerly Great British Empire. In and out of Black and White houses, past the Terror Club, up hill and down dale to arrive at a Circle Check next to Jim’s Pub. It was then a sharp U turn back the same direction. Drains, fields, more Black and Whites, steep and slippery descents to finally enter the HDB Fitness Park on the corner of Lentor Ave. After a few chin ups and squats, it was across Sembawang Rd to the grasslands that resembled more of a swamp after the rain. A few runners waded through the reeds and a water hole that was waist deep only to have to retrace their steps on finding a check.
The pathway down to the canal had a strategically placed T Check 100 metres before some rather fierce looking machinery that was undertaking maintenance at the canal. Tiger Lily, however, fancied one of the Bangladeshi tractor operators and ignored the T Check. Almost the rest of the sheep followed her and they made their way past the machinery and
along the canal,despite their being no markings. They decided that the markings had been dug up by the handsome tractor operator.
Anyway, those that actual saw the T then turned back for a leisurely stroll back up Sembawang Rd to home. Those that went with Tiger Lily went home via the mosque, where they would have seen Boo’s footprints, except for the fact they are all blind.
Unfortunately, Boo made it back, thus destroying my chance of Run of the Year.
Well done Hare, if I don’t mind saying so myself. ‘Outsatnding run,’ was also heard from Terry, a visiting Virgin, which just shows that he has impeccable judgement and has an outstanding Hashing career ahead of him.
Next week’s run: Rong Guang Barbeque Seafood (carpark), corner Ulu Pandan Road and Clementi Road, enter from Ulu Pandan Road.
Lipstick: No naughty boys tonight, is this a first? How did Boo get let off as he certainly had no one in front of him the whole way. Mmm, come to think of it, he had no one behind him either.
Visitors: Jiggy Jig (ah, brings back holiday memories of Bali), Trash, Stiff, and a few others I completely missed. Why were they born so beautiful………
Virgins: My new friend with the incredible knowledge of knowing an OUTSTANDING run when he sees one, Terry.
Dick n Tits MIA again, but hope to be back next week. Well, that was from last week and still no sign of them so I am going to go back through the newsletters and track them down. Then I will name names. Remember, a good scribe always gets his Tits. Oh yeah, and his Dick.
Subs are due so pay up before Wet Pet and Singaporn rip your bloody arms off.
Ed: Also, please check the hareline to make sure you aren’t surprised that you are supposed to be setting the run next week. Up to date hareline is always at http://www.singaporeharriets.com, click on upcoming runs. We have a great hareline up until Christmas but after that we need hares. If you haven’t signed up for two runs yet, please do so with Posh Nash.
AOB
· The Scribe commences by asking all car owners to put their hands up, with their car keys rattling. Shoe Shopper immediately put her hand up but there was no rattling noise forthcoming. Sheepishly she came in and gathered the set of keys that had not been collected from the key bag.
· Shaggy Dick 2 suffered an undone shoe shopper lace on the run, so he stopped and bent over to do it up, as you do. While bent over doing his left over right etc, he thought, well this is the Harriets, perhaps one of the girls will give me a little slap on the bottom as they run past. Sure enough, there was a nice firm slap on his rump, just what the doctor ordered. Looking up to see which of the saucy young lassies had taken a liking to his posterior, he promptly fell onto head over heels as Father Anus went past him with a big grin.
· Maggot heard Tiger Lily complaining of a sore arse before the run. However, it did not stop her bending over on the run as well to tie up her shoe lace. Moral of story – People who have sore arse should not stop to tie up shoe lace.
· Shoe Shopper noticed our visitor Bruce wearing nice fresh clothes, but his Virgin mate he brought along, Terry, you know, the guy with fine judgement about Outstanding Runs, was still in his smelly, dirty running gear. ‘Why Terry?’ ‘Bruce didn’t tell me to bring a change of clothes.’ Bruce, you are the meanest,………
· Wet Pet noticed Terry’s web toed running shoes and proceeded to play footsies with him.
· King Lear was cleaning out his home library and came across a book titled ‘Sex in Australia,’ which he decided would be better off in my library. Just what was he doing with such a book anyway?
· Mother Tongue agrees with my thoughts and charges King Lear for having such a book in the first place. Exactly!
· Stiffy commented as it was a rather cool and wet evening, that a cold shower was not the order of the day. Doubleback managed to have a nice hot shower and she didn’t even do the run!
· Not Tonight gives her excuse as to why she and Stiffy were late to the run – they were held up by the Youth Olympic Games Torch relay. More likely Stiffy was following an old flame.
· Shaggy Dick 2 tells how busy the first week back at school is, with new students, new classes, new boss, so much to do. So there he is after work with Shoe Shopper, busy busy busy. And where is Cock Radio?? Busy trying to sneak out early to set the run without the new boss seeing him.
· Jack Off, after chatting non stop with the 2 visitors, discovered that Terry wears his webbed shoes full time, they are like a second skin to him. Here’s to 2 skin,…
· Shaggy Dick 2 noticed Wet Pet getting annoyed by the cars driving through the car park and disrupting our circle. ‘Why can’t they drive the other way?’ she complains. ‘Ummm, maybe because it is one way.’ Suggests SD2.
· Bloodshit suggests a naming for Terry, Two Skins. After debate, it was decided it was too premature.
· Wet Thong has noticed all the girls are wearing flat shoes, except for Twin Towers who stands out in a pair of very high heels.
· Doubleback was a bit confused at one stage when there was a call of ‘Need a girl.’ Umm, this is the Harriets.
· I decided to ask Boo if he would write tonights run report. Of course the answer was no, because after the first Circle he was not seen again and doesn’t know where the run actually went ha ha.
And on that note, On on on to Beaulieu House Restaurant down by the sea.
Sribed by Cock Radio, ah it’s great to be back!